Oh, you hate your job? Why didn’t you say so?
There’s a support group for that.
It’s called everybody, and they meet at the bar.
I adore quotes. Inspirational ones generally; but the other day I was thinking about quotes relating to alcohol. I pulled some together to share with you: funny, sobering – and inspirational.
The funny ….
When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.
I’m not an alcoholic, I only drink two times a year. On my birthday and when it’s not my birthday.
I believe that when life gives you lemons, you make lemonade — and then try to find someone whose life is giving them vodka, and have a party.
I’m an occasional drinker, the kind of guy who goes out for a beer and wakes up in Singapore with a full beard.
I drink to make other people more interesting.
I like to have a martini, Two at the very most. After three I’m under the table, after four I’m under my host.
I feel sorry for people who don’t drink. When they wake up in the morning, that’s as good as they’re going to feel all day.
~Frank Sinatra (also attributed to actor Jack Lemmon)
I’ll stick with gin. Champagne is just ginger ale that knows somebody.
~Hawkeye of M*A*S*H,
Work is the curse of the drinking classes.
I envy people who drink – at least they know what to blame everything on.
I like to keep a bottle of stimulant handy in case I see a snake, which I also keep handy.
The sobering …
The first glass is a sedative, the second a psychologist, the third glass an excuse, and the fourth a lobotomy.
First you take a drink, then the drink takes a drink, then the drink takes you.
~F. Scott Fitzgerald
How come if alcohol kills millions of brain cells, it never killed the ones that made me want to drink?
Health – what my friends are always drinking to before they fall down.
Our government land costs one dollar and twenty-five cents an acre, and good whiskey two dollars a bottle. How many men die landless who during their lives have swallowed whole townships — trees and all?
~Author unknown, c.1878 (me: alcohol has been a addiction issue for a long time)
Memory impairment: the free prize at the bottom of every vodka bottle.
~Big Bang Theory
The first thing in the human personality that dissolves in alcohol is dignity.
If drinking is interfering with your work, you’re probably a heavy drinker. If work is interfering with your drinking, you’re probably an alcoholic.
If you know someone who tries to drown their sorrows, you might tell them sorrows know how to swim.
~H. Jackson Brown, Jr
Almost anything can be preserved in alcohol, except health, happiness, and money.
~Mary Wilson Little, 1897
Your body is a temple, but keep the spirits on the outside.
Drinking makes such fools of people, and people are such fools to begin with, that it’s compounding a felony.
Wine hath drowned more men than the sea.
Alcoholism is a well documented pathological reaction to unresolved grief.
It is the wine that leads me on, the wild wine that sets the wisest man to sing at the top of his lungs, laugh like a fool – it drives the man to dancing… it even tempts him to blurt out stories better never told.
~Homer, The Odyssey (8th century)
As an alcoholic, you will violate your standards quicker than you can lower them.
… and the inspirational
My recovery must come first so that everything I love in life doesn’t have to come last.
The goal isn’t to be sober. The goal is to love yourself so much that you don’t need to drink.
I want to be remembered for my recovery, not my addiction
Three empowering words: I Don’t Drink
I think recovery from anything is honestly the most badass thing a person can do
I am not defined by my relapses, but by my decision to remain in recovery despite them.
The day I became free of alcohol was the day that I fully understood and embraced the truth that I would not be giving anything up by not drinking.
~ Liz Hemingway, “I Need To Stop Drinking!”