I never dreamed I could pull this off …

Day 341.

“Sweet dreams are made of this
Who am I to disagree?
I travel the world
And the seven seas
Everybody’s looking for something”
                Eurythmics

It feels unreal to me that I am almost a year sober. I never thought I could get a handle on this self-medicating habit that had spiralled out of control over the last couple of years.

I’m now just 25¢ short of $365!!!!

I was looking at some of my older posts … and I recall these feelings so vividly.

• Went through a phase where I drank loads (bottles) of fake wine .. realized it was a bad habit only replacing a really bad habit! It’s been at least five months since I’ve had a glass of the fake wine. I may just pick up a bottle of Fré for the Christmas dinner, just to have a glass in hand to celebrate the year that was in it.
• Have spent time thinking regretfully of the bottles of wine I’ll miss out on from here on in. Thinking about sitting in a villa in Italy WITHOUT a glass of wine! The hardship! Right?? Hahahahaha. No longer feeling that. I just know I can’t do one glass. I pretty much now accept that. But I still dream of sitting in a villa overlooking Lake Como in Italy.
• Pondered if in 2019 I’d TREAT myself to a moderation program. I now know this is just cray cray thinking – and I’m off of that feeling now.
• A few times over this year I’ve thought about a drink, and recalled the smell of it! Not in a nice way, more a ugh way. Especially old wine the next day. That is big for me!
• Making plans now, over this year, never worrying about how I’ll get home. No hangovers ever again appeals to me so much. What a wonderful feeling.